The Penny

Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.

[Friday, April 3, 2009]


I know a wonderful child, whom I will call Blue. Blue is a worrier, who really struggles with anxiety. This child has had a rough life, so it's understandable.

Blue's grandpa died earlier this week. This child tends to get a lot of worries out during speech... I might be the only adult that this child is with privately, besides family. I like to think that I'm nonthreatening enough to make the child feel comfortable enough to express feelings. Blue lives with the grandparents, so Grandpa's lingering illness and death have been tough.

Blue told me that Grandpa died in his sleep and that he would be coming back in a box. He would wake up in the box. Blue's dog died before, but Grandpa and the dog will not be together, because Grandpa is in the box.

Grandpa can see Blue, but Blue cannot find Grandpa.

It is apparent that Grandma tried her best to explain death and what happened to grandpa, but it only made Blue more anxious. Now the child is scared to go to sleep. And to eat ice cream. Grandpa loved to eat ice cream, and now he is dead. The causal link is obvious.

Blue will NEVER die. Never.

I had to bite my tongue to keep from explaining that Blue will see Grandpa again. It really stinks that so many people do not know where they will go after death, and that families can be together forever. It's not fair that a child has to suffer with these horrible thoughts, that I cannot explain the truths that might help her feel better about the situation. I can listen, which is still valuable, I know.

Well, I did make it clear that ice cream is not lethal and that Grandpa will NOT wake up in the box.

Although I was sad when my grandmother died last month, and I still am sad about it, I was also happy for her. She's not in pain, and she can learn about the gospel now. And I know I will see her again.

I don't want to die, because I need more opportunities to improve before I meet God again, but I'm not scared to die.

April 4, 2009
Just as a postscript...

I asked a counselor to speak with Blue, and the counselor reported that this happened. The finality of death was emphasized. Not what I meant at all! Sigh. Oh, well.


Morgan | April 18, 2009 at 3:39 PM

what does gopel mean and emphasized.

Annie | April 18, 2009 at 6:11 PM

Morgan, gospel means things that Jesus said. Things that God wants us to know. Things that are true.

It's OK to be afraid to die. Many people are afraid to die.

But you do not need to worry. You are a good girl, so you would go straight to heaven. Maybe you would see Pa Joe there, or Grandma Mary, or Grandpa Judge. I think Kirby is there, and Footsie and Mekah. Heaven is very happy. People get to be with their family and learn things.

Emphasized means that they said it VERY STRONGLY so that the other person understands. The counselor told Blue that when someone dies, THAT'S IT. They can't wake up. They don't come back. I didn't think that made Blue feel better.

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